Tag Archives: mental health

Rachel’s Right–Again!

Instead of counting minutes, maybe count priorities.

Being in Lancaster County always feels a bit like being home again. We made this year’s visit towards the end of Road Trip 2024 somewhat intentionally to aid us in the “re-entry” to life as we usually practice it.

This sign on a Pennsylvania Bank serves as a reminder that we’re in Amish Country. Maybe I should have brought “my” oxen! (Yes, I’ve seen buggies at the drive-up window.)

One of our first stops was to see our young Amish friends Katie, Hanna Rose, and Rachel. All three are wise beyond their years, and their years are increasing. I was especially curious to talk with Rachel. We had a shared interest in teaching–what fun it was to compare notes! But last year we learned that she’d stopped teaching–Katie spilled the beans, explaining, “She’s in a relationship.”

After some friendly teasing, Rachel explained that it’s possible to have too many priorities and that, while she enjoyed teaching, her relationship and future family would be her focus. (Read last year’s story here.

When we arrived this year, one of the young boys was sent to get her—she was helping her mother make and can ketchup. After a few preliminaries, I was not surprised to learn that she’s getting married on October 29th. She was glowing, and it was not just from the hot work of washing dishes.

Most conversations with the Amish I find are very mutual. She seemed equally interested in what I was doing and planning. At one point, I reminded her of our age difference and said, “I’m told that at my age, the two most important words are ‘comfort’ and ‘fun.'” She interrupted.

“And peace,” she said. “Don’t forget peace.”

The interruption surprised me, but the suggestion didn’t. Making peace a priority makes sense at any age. It’s one reason I try to keep my worry box small, so there’s not a lot of room for things to worry about. The peaceful pace is one thing that attracts me to the Amish. Rachel isn’t the only one who counts priorities instead of minutes and hours.

Sure, it’s possible to have too many priorities. But it’s also possible not to have enough or to miss an important one. It almost goes without saying that we should constantly check our priorities against our values. When I talked with my new Amish friend Roy in Ohio, he expressed some concern over the proliferation of e-bikes among the Amish. He’s not sure how that will change their communities over time. Questions like that are often more important than the answers. Our priorities should be driven by our values. We have more control over our values and priorities than we often exercise or even realize.

Thanks to Rachel, I’m adding “peace” to my package of priorities. I explained to her that I’ve always worked towards what I call “positive apathy.” It showed up last night when we stopped for ice cream at an Amish farm.

Grandma had a spray bottle and cloth and was eyeing the outside tables. I glanced heavenward and joked that it was likely to rain soon and the tables would wash themselves. She smiled and said, “We really need the rain.” (Rain should be a priority!) So, while I’d hoped to walk some with the camera, the rain is needed by the farmers and the earth. So be it. There is no need to worry or get upset. Peace, comfort, fun.

It may seem ironic that I’m adding to a package that is getting smaller, but I think it works that way. As the saying goes, “Less is more.”

Rain can be calming.

It Was Sunday, Afterall

Let’s start a movement and call it “Simply Sunday.” The idea behind it would be how simple can we make life on Sundays.

So the short update for yesterday is simply short. We didn’t do much. Just to give you an idea of what that means, one significant event was munching on maple-frosted cinnamon buns purchased on Saturday.

We did reinstitute the decades-old tradition of “going for a Sunday Drive” to nowhere in particular. That included some picture-taking.

Monday (today) is not proving quite as simple. For some reason, downloading yesterday’s photos from the camera is challenging. I think I’ve narrowed the problem down to a faulty adapter.

So here I am in a place where I can readily find maple-frosted cinnamon buns, fresh fruits and vegetables, and whole milk. However, I’m not so sure the cable I need will be easily located, which might not be a bad thing.

A return visit to Behalt is coming up and takes priority, either today or tomorrow morning. Tomorrow night, we have dinner prepared by an Amish couple in their home. I can still take photos (no face shots of the Amish*). Posting them may be delayed.

The technology issue is truly a gelassenheit moment.**

We are moving slower and sleeping better. Is that a sufficient update for today?


*The subject of photographing the Amish is not as simple as many people believe. While at Behalt, the two volunteers (Mennonites) assured me I could photograph anything but them–it was obviously a camera shyness and somewhat humorous request. I teased, “Oh, I understand. You think that taking your picture with a camera will steal your soul.” We had a good laugh, but there are Englisch who believe the Amish think that.

**Gelassenheit is a German word often used to describe the Amish mindset. It does not translate easily, but the Cambridge Dictionary explains it “means calmness, composure, poise or serenity in English.” It’s a sort of “so be it” way of thinking that I have written about elsewhere. Check out Cows, Corn, and Calm.

A Conversation That Matters

I’m honored to be part of a powerful collaboration to confront escalating suicide rates. RSU 19 Adult Education, American Legion Post 73, and I are joining hands to offer a free workshop to raise awareness and encourage the prevention of this growing healthcare crisis.

It is up to all of us—educators, veterans, families, and community members—to unite in this significant cause. Through education, support, and open dialogue, we can contribute to reducing the stigma associated with mental health issues and work towards a future where everyone feels valued, supported, and empowered to seek help.

Pre-registration is strongly encouraged by calling RSU 19 Adult Education at 368-3290. Doors open at 5:30 pm and the Post will be providing light refreshments.

For additional information and FAQ regarding the workshop content and attendance visit this page.

Resources You Should Know

These resources came in part from an e-newseltter from Maine Senator Stacy Guerin. All are free and I have “vetted” them.

Anyone affected by the violence in Lewiston is encouraged to reach out and connect with behavioral health support. Incidents of mass violence can lead to a range of emotional reactions, including anxiety, fear, anger, despair and a sense of helplessness that may begin immediately or in the days or weeks following the event.

Seek help immediately if you or someone you know is talking about suicide, feelings of hopelessness or unbearable pain, or about being a burden to others.

If you are experiencing a medical emergency, call 911.

For those in need of immediate support:

Call or text 988: This suicide and behavioral health crisis hotline is answered 24 hours a day, seven days a week by trained crisis specialists offering free, confidential support for anyone. Specialists also can respond by chat at 988lifeline.org. Information for the deaf and hard of hearing is available here.

Text “Hello” to 741 741. (Actually, any word will do!) The Crisis Text Line is data-driven and has an excellent track record. Highly recommended for teens and youth.

Clinicians, educators and first responders can call (800) 769-9819: The FrontLine WarmLine offers free support services to help these professionals manage the stress of responding to disasters from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m., seven days a week.

If you’re unsure, contact 211. It provides general information, including how to access behavioral health and social service resources 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Information can also be found at 211maine.org.

All of these resources provide free, confidential support.

The State of Maine has created a dedicated webpage with these and other resources, including online support and resources for children and families.

Please share this post freely. Be sensitive to your friends and neighbors and if they seem to be troubled, do not hesitate to show that you care and listen. You can even offer to help them contact one of these helpful resources.

Can I Help with the Peaches?

Actually, there is no direct connection between Kauffman Orchards and B… and if this photo looks a little blurry, understand it was taken from a moving horse and buggy!

During a recent visit to Central Pennsylvania, I decided to revisit one young friend (“B”) I’d talked to last summer. She told me then she had just decided to stay with the Amish Faith and shared some of her thoughts and reasons. I was quite literally “blown away” by her honesty and thinking. We even discussed some of the difficulties she anticipated. When the conversation ended, she said how wonderful it was that we had learned from each other.

I didn’t see her working at the farmstand this year, but I mentioned her to the older Amish gentleman who collected for my purchases. He smiled some, jerked a thumb over this shoulder, and said, “She’s in the back peeling peaches. You should go talk to her.”

I felt oddly honored that I was allowed through the “employees only” door. I found her making short work of peeling and cutting up a huge basket of peaches.

I was not disappointed. She remembered me and was only too happy to share some updates. We actually had quite a discussion about “social media.” She has a phone because, in addition to working at her family’s farm stand, she has started her own business. She explained how she uses the phone and how she doesn’t. Prior to baptism and joining, she used the phone freely, but she also saw how using the phone impacted her. I agreed with her and found myself a bit jealous of her achievement. In so many words, we agreed that it’s important to think about how things impact us.

It wouldn’t be accurate to say she’s a lucky girl because I’m not sure luck is involved. She is taking full responsibility for her choices and the consequences of them. She’s a critical thinker–I noticed that last year. She made the point then that choosing to remain Amish would not be based on the things she is giving up. She is staying Amish for what she will gain.

I’ve noticed that conversations about the Amish typically drift to what they don’t have or accept. “They don’t have electricity.” {That’s only partially true. ) “They don’t drive cars; they have to use horses and buggies.” (Again a partial truth.) We seem to make it sound like being Amish is all about giving things up and following rules.

B doesn’t see it that way. She is not a victim of being Amish. She chooses not to sit at home and play computer games on her phone. She is choosing her way of life. We talked a lot about who we are and who we will become, and how life is a journey and process. She also knows what she doesn’t know.

Gellasenheit! (Ironically, when I used that word with her last year, she didn’t know the meaning. She found it interesting and amusing that she was learning an Amish way of thinking from an Englischer.

B continues to work at the family farmstand. Since last year she’s also started her own successful business. She somewhat shyly shared that she’s “in a relationship.” I teased, “So next year you’ll be married and I won’t find you here.” Her reply was straight to the point, “Oh, I doubt that!” Later, I wished I’d clarified. She might have meant she’d probably be married but still at the family farm stand. One thing for sure, she’ll have made her decisions thoughtfully.

I didn’t ask, but if I were to guess she’s in her late teens. Most Amish join the church between the ages of 18 and 21.

In the Amish world, she is NOT an exception. I could share other stories and examples. She finished the peaches while we talked. I can handle that sort of multitasking. I am challenged to talk with someone who is also typing on their smartphone.

I am proud, honored, and blessed to know her.