Category Archives: Simple Living

Anchor Category that incompasses simple thinking.

Enjoying the Moment

While in Canada, I attended a ceilidh. A ceilidh (pronounced KAY-lee) is a traditional Scottish and Irish social gathering that features live folk music and dance. This one was more accurately a concert. About a hundred people sat in a semicircle around the performers.

Image courtesy of Pixabay

Unlike most concerts, this didn’t have the usual prohibition of recordings and photographs. From the back, I noticed how many hands held smartphones high at any given moment. It reminded me of school days, when students wanted to be called on. When you think about it, smartphones do beg for attention.

Earlier in the day, I’d seen an informal review of a different ceilidh. The reviewer was disappointed that the venue didn’t offer a place to dance. Her point was well taken. She knows a ceilidh is a gathering in a room full of music, laughter, and people of all ages dancing, whooping, and clapping.

So maybe I didn’t attend a ceilidh. Whatever it was, a number of attendees spent a lot of time and energy recording short segments of it, fiddling (note the intentional use of that word) with their phones, watching instant replays, and showing the results to their neighbor.

I didn’t count, but several of these people left at intermission. I wanted to chase after them and ask a few questions. The big one was, “Did you fully enjoy the ‘moment,’ or was it more fun recording it?” I’m not judging. I’m curious.

And I’ll confess. I wasn’t fully enjoying the music while I was entertaining these thoughts. I even regret not getting a photo or two of those raised smartphones to illustrate this article. I enjoyed the moment; just not as intended. If I may use another “e word,” I was engaged in something other than the music.

Day two included another event that more closely qualified as a ceilidh. Photos and recording were prohibited. There were other differences, but I chose to focus on that one. It freed people to ignore their smartphones and participate in the performance.

There was an abundance of “dancing, whooping, and clapping.” The dancing was limited to the performers because of space constraints, but the audience whooped and clapped a lot. Toe tapping and knee slapping were hard to observe in the darkened theatre. But it felt like the audience enjoyed the moment mentally, emotionally, and physically. I know I did.

Looking back on both events, I find myself wondering if I was truly “enjoying the moment” and “getting what I came for.” It’s ultimately my responsibility to make sure I do.

Phones held high, or hands busy clapping. Both are a way of being there. It’s worth knowing which one you came for.

Quick Quip #26-07

When I taught the real estate licensing course, I often joked that I could make students pick up their pencils. All I had to do was say, “This sounds like a good test question.”

It was fun and arguably effective, but it wasn’t great teaching. The best teaching is autodidactic. (If you look that word up, you’ve been autodidactic.)

Of course, one student chastised me: “You said it would be a good test question, but it wasn’t on the test.” I replied, “Gee, I’m sorry you learned it.”

Do you see what’s wrong with this picture?

You’re Not Busy, Are You?

I haven’t counted, but I’ve heard a lot of people whining lately about how busy they are. Perhaps I’ve done my fair share of claiming busyness, although I try not to, partly because of a bias I developed a few years ago when I was asked by a client to teach “time management.” Since I believe prescription without diagnosis is malpractice in medicine, management, and education, I looked at what was going on in his organization.

I concluded that time management wasn’t the issue. Priority management was the issue. The corporate culture had developed an unintended value that appearing overworked and stressed was important. I joked that most employees seemed too busy to do any meaningful work.

There’s an old joke about the company president who issued the memorandum that “We will keep having meetings until we figure out why nothing is getting done.” Talk about confusing activity with accomplishment!

I suppose it’s always been true, but lately it seems like being busy is some sort of badge of honor. The busier you are, the bigger and shinier badge you get to wear. I think it’s contagious. I know it’s competitive.

If you’re a social media buff, see how many timeline posts you can find claiming, “Well, I don’t have much to do…”

Contrast that with those who are compelled to report their entire day’s schedule. It has a humorous aspect. “Gee, I’m so busy I barely had time to find these cute cat/puppy pictures to share.”

I’m sorry to say, I’m not impressed by busyness, particularly when it becomes a reason (excuse) for failure to do something others are depending on. I know several people who will spend a lot of time explaining how busy they are, how much they have to do, and how sorry they are they haven’t gotten to… I bite my tongue so I don’t observe out loud; they could have crossed a few things off the list in the time they spent telling me their story.

If your goal is staying busy, that’s not a difficult achievement. But it doesn’t necessarily equate to meaningful accomplishment. Doing nothing can be an accomplishment, too.

I had the good fortune to attend a few lectures by Ned Hermann back in the late ’80s. Ned was a true pioneer in the field of creative thinking and reasoning. He was also a great storyteller. In one of his lectures, he was explaining “theta” — those low-frequency brain waves associated with the early stages of sleep and the process of dreaming. They are also associated with enhanced creativity. He shared that he was sitting in his recliner, pushed back and relaxed, consciously entering a theta-like state. When his wife called to him to take out the trash, he replied, “Can’t now… I’m working.”

I don’t think it would have been any less true if he’d said, “Can’t now… I’m busy.” What might appear as “doing nothing” may have great value. It really is about value.

Busy is about being engaged–it’s not about being overworked and overwhelmed. Busy is not a bad thing when it means the busy person is anxious to contribute and is seeking action.

The question we may need to ask ourselves occasionally is whether or not we are busy (engaged) with things that are truly important. How we decide importance may be a different topic for a different day. For now, let’s agree being busy for the sake of being busy isn’t effective or efficient. When we think we’re too busy to do certain things, we’re really saying those things aren’t important. Or at least they aren’t important enough to make time and find the energy for, along with the other
stuff.

It sounds rude, but I’ve found myself wishing people would be more honest and offer the explanation, “That’s not something I’m willing to make important right now.” Being honest might be as important as being busy.

You’re not busy, are you?

Kevin Hart

Quick Quip #26-06

I have a mug that reads “Oh boy! This calls for a spreadsheet!” I recently did a “brain dump” about homeschooling that included some preliminary analysis that begs for a spreadsheet. (Hint: how much time in public schools is spent in actual learning?) I shared it with a friend and follower, Mary Meyer. She replied, “My goodness – you are really thinking about stuff these days,” adding that she believes thinking is fun for the brain.

Crossword puzzles are an example of brain fun, but almost anything that promotes thinking qualifies!

Are you allowing your brain to have enough fun?