Tag Archives: memory

This is important…

Bethanie and I preparing for Memorial Day
Bethanie and I preparing for Memorial Day

“Nothing is ever really lost to us as long as we remember it.”

L. M. Montgomery

For me, Memorial Day is always a day of reflection and tradition. Unfortunately, one tradition has been lost because of distance. And yet it has not been lost because of memory.

Some of my most vivid childhood memories center on this day. I remember multiple trips to the cemetery with my father. We would retrieve the flag holder from his father’s grave for wire brushing and a fresh coat of paint before the new flags were placed. I felt a special sense of pride that Grandfather had two flags–British and American, although I didn’t fully understand why at the time.

Of course there was grass to trim and flowers to plant. We also had to go to the Legion Hall because there were rifles to clean and ready. Dad led the honor guard and he strove for perfection. To this day, I long to hear “one shot” when the volley is fired. And after all these years, I consider myself fortunate that I can still remember those days when the whole town turned out to follow the parade. I wish we still did that.

Dad served in the Navy, stationed in the South Pacific during World War II. I believe he strove for perfection because it a way of honoring and remembering those who didn’t come home. In the too few years he and I had together he taught me many things. On Memorial Day I learned “This is important.”

I was five when my Dad was laid to rest next to his father. When old enough I accepted the responsibility for maintaining the family plot. For a while I was able to share it with my daughter Bethanie.

Abbot Memorial Day 2012
Abbot Memorial Day 2012 “This is important.”

Time has passed. Life has happened. And while I miss actually making those preparations I am pleased they are not lost.

Today is a day for remembering and there is much to remember. I’ll be at our town parade. Most of these parades get a little shorter every year. The news reports that one town in Massachusetts will not have a parade, “There aren’t enough veterans.” But in my mind I’ll see an endless line of veterans marching. They are not lost. I’ll probably get a lump in my throat when taps are played.  But I’ll smile when I remember that the term “taps”   originates from the Dutch term taptoe, meaning “close the beer taps and send the troops back to camp.”

Remembering and reflecting does not have to be about loss. “Nothing is ever really lost as long as we remember it.”

Day is done, gone the sun
From the lakes, from the hills, from the sky
All is well, safely rest
God is nigh.
Fading light dims the sight
And a star gems the sky, gleaming bright
From afar, drawing near
Falls the night.
Thanks and praise for our days
Neath the sun, neath the stars, neath the sky
As we go, this we know
God is nigh.

Memorial Day–Not About Loss

Bethanie and I preparing for Memorial Day
Bethanie and I preparing for Memorial Day some forty years ago.

“Nothing is ever really lost to us as long as we remember it.”

L. M. Montgomery

For me, Memorial Day is always a day of reflection and tradition. Unfortunately, one tradition has been lost because of distance. And yet it has not been lost because of memory.

Some of my most vivid childhood memories center on this day. I remember multiple trips to the cemetery with my father. We would retrieve the flag holder from his father’s grave for wire brushing and a fresh coat of paint before the new flags were placed. I felt a special sense of pride that Grandfather had two flags–British and American, although I didn’t fully understand why.

Of course there was grass to trim and flowers to plant. We also had to go to the Legion Hall because there were rifles to clean and ready. Dad led the honor guard and he strove for perfection. To this day, I long to hear “one shot” when the volley is fired. After all these years, I consider myself fortunate that I can still remember those days when the whole town turned out to follow the parade. I wish we still did that.

I was seven when my Dad was laid to rest next to his father. When old enough I accepted the responsibility for maintaining the family plot. For a while I was able to share it with my daughter Bethanie. Time has passed. Life has happened. And while I miss actually making those preparations I am pleased they are not lost.

Today is a day for remembering and there is much to remember. I’ll be at our town parade. Most of these parades get a little shorter every year. The news reports that one town in Massachusetts will not have a parade, “There aren’t enough veterans.” But in my mind I’ll see an endless line of veterans marching. They are not lost. I’ll probably get a lump in my throat when taps are played.  But I’ll smile when I remember that the term “taps”   originates from the Dutch term taptoe, meaning “close the beer taps and send the troops back to camp.”

Remembering and reflecting does not have to be about loss. “Nothing is ever really lost as long as we remember it.”

Day is done, gone the sun
From the lakes, from the hills, from the sky
All is well, safely rest
God is nigh.
Fading light dims the sight
And a star gems the sky, gleaming bright
From afar, drawing near
Falls the night.
Thanks and praise for our days
Neath the sun, neath the stars, neath the sky
As we go, this we know
God is nigh.

2012 — Keep going!

“If you’re going through hell, keep going.”

We have Winston Churchill to thank for that pearl of wisdom. There’s also a Yiddish Proverb that suggests “Bygone troubles are good to tell.” Good stuff to think about as we prepare to end one year and begin another.

Many people will attempt to wax eloquent on occasions such as this–odd, in a way because all we’re really doing is changing one digit at the end of the dates on our calendars. But it is an opportunity to reflect on the past, present, and future. I can’t resist some attempted eloquence myself.

Shall I enjoy sharing some bygone troubles? (Did I just hear a collective groan?) Let’s understand the wisdom is not in sharing the troubles. The wisdom (and joy) is that those troubles are past! I’m typing this on a new laptop with the latest software versions.  I could, I’m sure, share a number of troubles I was having prior to this–some were amusing, all were frustrating. There were days when I was sure I was experiencing hell.

“You can’t do that unless you have the current version of Internet Explorer.”

“You can’t install the latest version of Internet Explorer unless you have Windows 7”

“You can’t install Windows 7 on your current machine because…”

Perhaps someday hell will be defined as having obsolete technology. I’m happy to report, however, that those troubles are “bygone,” at least for a few months until newer and better starts arriving. I’m told that three years is now about the maximum life expectancy of most technology.

For some reason, all this reminded me of the black-capped chickadees I enjoy watching at the feeder. Science tells us that these little wonders store (cache) food, but only remember the locations for about 28 days. And you thought you were having long-term memory problems? As I recall (I encountered this bit of information some years ago), the chickadees are constantly growing new brain cells and, of course, creating new memories.

It might be tempting to wish for the chickadee’s ability–imagine starting over with new memories every month or so? Talk about bygone troubles! “Hey, I’m going through hell right now but in 28 days I won’t remember it!”

The obvious problem is that you won’t remember the good times, either. But where would we be without the memories of our adversities? Perhaps it is time to remove some of the value judgements we quickly place on things that have happened, are happening, or may happen. There was one task I faced with the upgrades that I truly dreaded–partly because it had caused me great pain during past upgrades. I put it off until the last possible moment. My fingers shook a bit on the keys and mouse… but I did it without a hitch.

“Keep going…” is a great slogan for a new year. I think I’ll make it mine. So I suppose I can offer the traditional “Happy New Year” greeting… but my real wish for you is that you’ll keep going!