Tag Archives: community

Don’t Count on It!

cute diverse children near school bus
Photo by Mary Taylor on Pexels.com

Here’s a short message for kids and parents everywhere. Things don’t always happen the way they’re supposed to. Let me explain.

I recently stopped for a school bus. That’s not big news. It is an example of things happening the way they should. I was facing the bus and could see past it, noticing that the cars behind it had also stopped exactly as they should.

The lights flashed, the stop sign on the bus opened, and the safety arm across the front of the bus swung wide.

Four or five kids got off the bus. They ranged in size from tiny ones with outsized backpacks to some older ones. They came around the front of the bus. So far, so good.

Some ran, some walked in front of the bus and across the highway.

When they started across my lane, I started yelling at them even though there was no way they could hear me. They didn’t stop or even pause to look up and down the road. Fortunately, everything was working the way it should. Well, almost everything. I think the kids were supposed to look both ways.

Safety shouldn’t be delegrated;
it should be shared.

“Mr. Boomsma”

Sometimes, things don’t work the way they should. I can think of several ways that might have been the case. Several days later, there was a headline from a distant state where someone didn’t stop for a school bus, and a child was injured.

If we want kids to feel and be safe, we need to involve them. It wouldn’t be so bad for them to learn they have some responsibility for staying safe. A few seconds long pause to look up and down the road is just plain smart.

At the start of the school year, perhaps parents should meet the bus and ensure the kids do. I’d be happy if the bus driver kept the window open told the kids to stop and look–at least until they got into the habit. It’s been a few years since I’ve attended a school bus safety program, but I’d be thrilled if crossing in front of the bus was part of that curriculum. Safety shouldn’t be delegated; it should be shared.

Resources You Should Know

These resources came in part from an e-newseltter from Maine Senator Stacy Guerin. All are free and I have “vetted” them.

Anyone affected by the violence in Lewiston is encouraged to reach out and connect with behavioral health support. Incidents of mass violence can lead to a range of emotional reactions, including anxiety, fear, anger, despair and a sense of helplessness that may begin immediately or in the days or weeks following the event.

Seek help immediately if you or someone you know is talking about suicide, feelings of hopelessness or unbearable pain, or about being a burden to others.

If you are experiencing a medical emergency, call 911.

For those in need of immediate support:

Call or text 988: This suicide and behavioral health crisis hotline is answered 24 hours a day, seven days a week by trained crisis specialists offering free, confidential support for anyone. Specialists also can respond by chat at 988lifeline.org. Information for the deaf and hard of hearing is available here.

Text “Hello” to 741 741. (Actually, any word will do!) The Crisis Text Line is data-driven and has an excellent track record. Highly recommended for teens and youth.

Clinicians, educators and first responders can call (800) 769-9819: The FrontLine WarmLine offers free support services to help these professionals manage the stress of responding to disasters from 8 a.m. to 8 p.m., seven days a week.

If you’re unsure, contact 211. It provides general information, including how to access behavioral health and social service resources 24 hours a day, seven days a week. Information can also be found at 211maine.org.

All of these resources provide free, confidential support.

The State of Maine has created a dedicated webpage with these and other resources, including online support and resources for children and families.

Please share this post freely. Be sensitive to your friends and neighbors and if they seem to be troubled, do not hesitate to show that you care and listen. You can even offer to help them contact one of these helpful resources.

Meeting Mrs. Miller!

Meeting Mrs. Miller is a story I wrote for the Blog “Amish America” run by Eric Wesner. I’ve been a long-time fan because it’s one of the most credible Amish-related sites on the Internet! I’m honored to have contributed!

For those who are “local,” Mrs. Miller is an Old Order Amish woman who is part of a fairly new Amish Community in the Corinth, Maine area. Stop by and say “Hello!” As I mentioned in the article, when I told her I was promoting her on the Internet, she said, “I’ve heard of that.” I’m not sure she fully appreciates how lucky she is on that point–there are days when I wish I wasn’t so familiar with it.

But then, how would you know about her and her stand if it weren’t for the Internet? Just don’t buy all her bread before I get there, please! She also runs out of homemade butter quickly.

The News is Where You Find It

We recently returned from vacation—most of it spent in “Amish Country” in Pennsylvania. I do have some stories to tell. (Search the site using the keyword “Amish.”)

As I do every year, I picked up a copy of The Budget newspaper. The Budget is a weekly newspaper published in Ohio for and by members of various plain Anabaptist Christian communities, including the Amish, Amish Mennonite, Beachy Amish, and plain Mennonite and Brethren communities.

There is no online version, and they do not maintain a website. The only way to subscribe is to send a note with a check. That will not be surprising if you know much about the “plain people.” What may surprise you is that it has been around since 1890 and, in spite of the failure rate of most print newspapers, shows no signs of weakening or losing “market share.” According to at least one source, it is one of the largest paid weekly circulation newspapers in the country. (This is an excellent article about The Budget!)

Since this is not going to qualify as a heavily researched article, suffice it to say that the Amish are organized into an estimated 600 districts around the country and Canada. I’m mentioning that because the newspaper is structured based on those districts. A simple description is that “scribes” (reporters) from each district submit news about their district each week for publication. It appears that most articles are submitted by snail mail or fax machine. (Most Amish are not big fans of technology.)

For one interested in communication and newsletter publishing, it’s a fascinating publication on a number of points. To oversimplify, it’s fascinating that it works and how it works. I’ve speculated that it works in a large part because of the absence of technology. But more importantly, the publishers understand and meet the needs of their market. A typical report from a district will include important details like which family hosted church most recently, who is getting married, who is recovering from illness or an accident, who is visiting relatives, and who is being visited by relatives. There’s often a mention of the weather and how the crops are doing.

Amish beliefs and culture place a great deal of importance on the family and the community. Amish couples may have as many as fifteen children in the more conservative groups, Six to eight is generally accepted as the average. The Budget helps those families stay connected even as family members move to another district.

The editors of The Budget know the information critical to maintaining a strong community, and they provide it. I recall one article reporting a recent farm accident and listing the schedule for the neighbors who are helping.

So where do we Englisch (non-Amish) find information about our families and communities? Before you answer “social media,” I’ve recently seen the suggestion that we should drop the word “social” and call it, more accurately, “media.” Given the algorithms, Facebook’s tendency to decide what users should see, what is relevant, and the emphasis on advertising, it’s probably fair to say families and community are not a high priority or value for the social media providers.

Is it at least interesting (if not concerning) non-Amish society isn’t starving for the information critical to maintaining strong communities? Is this a reflection of our society or a missed opportunity? That seems to be something worthy of thought.

Can I Help with the Peaches?

Actually, there is no direct connection between Kauffman Orchards and B… and if this photo looks a little blurry, understand it was taken from a moving horse and buggy!

During a recent visit to Central Pennsylvania, I decided to revisit one young friend (“B”) I’d talked to last summer. She told me then she had just decided to stay with the Amish Faith and shared some of her thoughts and reasons. I was quite literally “blown away” by her honesty and thinking. We even discussed some of the difficulties she anticipated. When the conversation ended, she said how wonderful it was that we had learned from each other.

I didn’t see her working at the farmstand this year, but I mentioned her to the older Amish gentleman who collected for my purchases. He smiled some, jerked a thumb over this shoulder, and said, “She’s in the back peeling peaches. You should go talk to her.”

I felt oddly honored that I was allowed through the “employees only” door. I found her making short work of peeling and cutting up a huge basket of peaches.

I was not disappointed. She remembered me and was only too happy to share some updates. We actually had quite a discussion about “social media.” She has a phone because, in addition to working at her family’s farm stand, she has started her own business. She explained how she uses the phone and how she doesn’t. Prior to baptism and joining, she used the phone freely, but she also saw how using the phone impacted her. I agreed with her and found myself a bit jealous of her achievement. In so many words, we agreed that it’s important to think about how things impact us.

It wouldn’t be accurate to say she’s a lucky girl because I’m not sure luck is involved. She is taking full responsibility for her choices and the consequences of them. She’s a critical thinker–I noticed that last year. She made the point then that choosing to remain Amish would not be based on the things she is giving up. She is staying Amish for what she will gain.

I’ve noticed that conversations about the Amish typically drift to what they don’t have or accept. “They don’t have electricity.” {That’s only partially true. ) “They don’t drive cars; they have to use horses and buggies.” (Again a partial truth.) We seem to make it sound like being Amish is all about giving things up and following rules.

B doesn’t see it that way. She is not a victim of being Amish. She chooses not to sit at home and play computer games on her phone. She is choosing her way of life. We talked a lot about who we are and who we will become, and how life is a journey and process. She also knows what she doesn’t know.

Gellasenheit! (Ironically, when I used that word with her last year, she didn’t know the meaning. She found it interesting and amusing that she was learning an Amish way of thinking from an Englischer.

B continues to work at the family farmstand. Since last year she’s also started her own successful business. She somewhat shyly shared that she’s “in a relationship.” I teased, “So next year you’ll be married and I won’t find you here.” Her reply was straight to the point, “Oh, I doubt that!” Later, I wished I’d clarified. She might have meant she’d probably be married but still at the family farm stand. One thing for sure, she’ll have made her decisions thoughtfully.

I didn’t ask, but if I were to guess she’s in her late teens. Most Amish join the church between the ages of 18 and 21.

In the Amish world, she is NOT an exception. I could share other stories and examples. She finished the peaches while we talked. I can handle that sort of multitasking. I am challenged to talk with someone who is also typing on their smartphone.

I am proud, honored, and blessed to know her.