Category Archives: Personal Growth

In the Air There’s a Spirit of… Panic?

I have to tell a little story on myself if only because it is, in retrospect, a bit funny. The experience also serves as evidence of the mind’s ability to process information quickly. Quickly is not the same as accurately.

I was shopping in Staples. Office supply stores are a personal weakness and I often allow myself some wandering time by rationalizing that there’s probably something I need that I’m going to forget. I was near the front of the store, noting there was already some Christmas spirit in the air.

Noticing things is important. I’ve always prided myself on being “situationally aware” — a skill that’s helped me avoid trouble on more than one occasion. In addition to the Christmas spirit, I noticed another shopper  standing about six feet away. She seemed distracted and was gazing about the area.

Suddenly a dot of light appeared in the center of her chest. Just as quickly it disappeared. But in what must have been a second or two I saw it re-appear, moving from the left back to the center of her chest. It was like a scene in a movie.

For a split second I considered yelling, “Gun!” and tackling her to the floor.

Except there was no gun.

A quick look around yielded no shooter but did reveal more dots, some on me. And they weren’t just red. Some were green!

So it turns out there was actually a laser light attached to the ceiling of the store. Similar to the disco balls that were popular a few years ago, it was rotating and sending random dots of red and green light throughout the front of the store’s featured gift area. The intent was, of course, to contribute to the holiday spirit and not to create momentary panic for those familiar with laser gun sights.

Since I try to find lessons in life events, I’ve replayed this several times in my mind. But instead of finding a moral in the story I tend to get chuckling over the prospect of how it might have turned out if I had reacted by leaping forward and tackling my fellow shopper. I’m sure it would have frightened her at first. So one version of the story has us both getting back up laughing.  But another considers the panic that could have resulted, not to mention someone deciding I needed a psychological evaluation.

We think of  “situational awareness” as being attuned to our environment–sensitive to what is taking place around us. But it also includes a need to be aware of how we are responding to the events and conditions going on around us. Overreacting may be as dangerous as not noticing.

 

BDN Series Mentions Mentoring…

“Maine Focus” is currently running a series of excellent articles “Before Addition There’s a Child.” I’m both honored and humbled to report that my  was included in the installment entitled “How one caring adult can change the life of a child.” (Scroll down to the epilog, “Your Stories.”) I continue to be amazed at the impact this story is having.

My ongoing hope is captured in my observation that “We mentor people in ways we don’t even mean to.” A corollary to that is mentoring doesn’t have to be hard. By definition, mentoring is a relationship in which an experienced person helps guide someone who is less experienced.  I think something as simple as  a kind or encouraging word creates a connection that can be defined as a relationship, however brief. Let’s call it a ‘mentoring moment.”

The Maine Focus series is about “preventing one of the largest public health problems of our time.” There’s a growing body of evidence that.

Mine isn’t the only story in which an adult did something that at first seems small, but turns out to have major impacts, perhaps because it is about human connection. Hearing those stories is encouraging and heartwarming. But creating our own stories can be even better. Just look for those mentoring moments.

Sometimes I Surprise Me!

Some would say it was a baptism by fire… or being thrown to the wolves.  I made a rather spontaneous decision this year to accept some middle and high school substitute teaching assignments. Truth be told, I’d been thinking about it for a while, so maybe it wasn’t that spontaneous. But when I accepted my first two assignments, I didn’t have it all worked out in my own mind and, for me, that means it was at least somewhat spontaneous.

So I found myself standing in front of a high school Spanish class, feeling a bit distracted and inadequate–not a good thing with a roomful of teenagers funneling in. At some level, I was thinking “How did I end up here?” while re-scanning the lesson plan which was, fortunately, written in English.  I was definitely out of my comfort zone.

Most of the kids at least knew who I was–that was a start. There were a few “high fives” as students walked in and took their places. Some of these kids I haven’t seen for a few years, so I was careful about calling people by name. Most seemed happy to see me and expressed surprise that I was going to be their sub. As the pre-class banter subsided and I began to take the roll, a student in the front asked, “Mr. Boomsma, do you know Spanish?”

I should have anticipated that question and prepared an answer, but this was a bit of a last minute assignment. So without much thought, I replied, “No I do not know Spanish. But I do know how to teach Spanish.”

By the time the words made it to the back of the room, I found myself surprised at the wisdom of that spontaneous answer.  I was even more surprised that my answer satisfied the kids, giving them confidence that today’s class wouldn’t be a total loss and might even be a learning experience.

Truth be told, they probably had more confidence in me than I did.

By the end of the class, I shared their confidence. There were several times I had to remind them, “I don’t know Spanish,” but together we got the work done  and they figured a lot out on their own. I found it interesting that some of them were surprised as well–at how much they were able to do and figure out.

Now that I’ve had some time to reflect on the day, another aspect of this has become apparent. Obviously, there’s an additional half to this equation. I could have said,

“No, I don’t know Spanish. But I know how to teach it. And you don’t know Spanish either–at least not much. But you know how to learn it.”

Perfect! (Fantastico!) Here we have the perfect blend of people  who know how to teach and people who know how to learn. We also have some structure (a lesson plan) and resources (dictionaries, worksheets, etc.). Teaching and learning will take place!

The line between teacher and learner should be very fuzzy. Perhaps in some ways, it should disappear.  I don’t know how you can teach without learning. And I don’t know how you can learn without teaching, if only yourself.

In what was hopefully an obvious play on words, I announced a few years ago “.”  One of the problems with “teaching” is that the teacher has to do all the work. There’s a wonderful quip about how lectures are a way of “transferring the instructor’s lecture notes to students’ notebooks without passing through the brains of either.”  What I’m proposing here is often called “interactive learning” in more pedantic circles. I’m not going to suggest it’s easier

“Teaching” in the traditional sense becomes something the teacher does to a student. What I’m proposing here is often called “interactive learning” in more pedantic circles. I’m not going to suggest it’s easier for the teacher. But when it works, both the teacher and the student are involved and working–and everybody’s brain is engaged.

I am not recommending we have people “teach” something they know nothing about as a matter or course. But we need to believe they can. If for example, you’re a parent who’s frustrated because you think you can’t help your child with his or her homework, I’ll bet you can. Just don’t make it all about teaching; make it about learning. You just might surprise yourself.

 

Suicide Awareness and Prevention Program Expanded

Suicide continues to be a public health care crisis in Maine and the nation. The numbers tell only part of the story. And focusing on suicide prevention, while a noble and necessary goal, is somewhat akin to looking at the tip of an iceberg. The path to attempted suicide is often long and winding. I believe the sooner we meet and connect with someone on that path, the more likely we can have an impact.

By comparison, we don’t ignore an unusual growth until it reaches stage four cancer. Are there signs and symptoms that an average person can recognize in others? This is one of the many questions the Suicide Awareness and Prevention Workshop I’m conducting this fall will attempt to answer.

This year’s workshops will continue to meet the requirements of LD 609. That bill, simply stated, requires every employee of all school systems to receive one to two hours of Suicide Awareness Training.  “Every employee” means anyone who receives a paycheck and includes substitute teachers, bus drivers, custodians—in fact, it is strongly recommended school volunteers receive the training as well. The training must follow research-based national guidelines.

Last year, workshops were attended by school employees, agency employees, pastors, parents, and folks who simply had an interest and felt a need for some basic strategies for helping others who might be experiencing emotional difficulties. Personally, I found this troubling, but also rewarding.  Evaluations of last year’s classes also revealed that, as a result of attending the workshop:

  • 85% of participants agreed or strongly agreed they feel more comfortable talking about suicide;
  • 93% agreed or strongly agreed they feel more confident in their ability to recognize suicide warning signs;
  • 85% felt better equipped to help someone who might seem suicidal.

The more good news is that some unanticipated circumstances created an opportunity to create an exciting alliance making It possible to expand offerings for this fall. My need for a facility to host courses in the local area is being generously met by the Guilford United Methodist Church. The Church is also extremely excited about being able to provide this important education to the community. It’s a win-win-win: students, church, instructor. Thanks to the Church’s generosity, we are currently scheduling three workshops, all free!

In addition to the Guilford workshops, the workshop is being sponsored by RSU 19 adult education in Newport and MSAD 53 in Pittsfield.

With GUMC providing the facility in Guilford, Abbot Village Press is the course sponsor. Even though the program is free, we are asking folks to pre-register assist with planning and printing handouts. Preregistration can be accomplished on the Abbot Village Press Website or by calling (207) 343-1842. Registration for the courses in Newport and Pittsfield should be made through the respective adult education offices.

These workshops are based on the Maine Suicide Prevention Program, an initiative of the Maine CDC in partnership with NAMI Maine. Check the expanded schedule!