“The key is not to prioritize what’s on your schedule, but to schedule your priorities.”
Steven Covey
Busyness has always interested me. In 2017, I wrote an article called “Just How Busy Are You, Really?” It attempted to create some thinking about prioritizing and how being “busy” can become a status symbol. Several years later, the question became, “You’re Not Busy, Are You?” It took a slightly different slant but raised some of the same questions about busyness. You may want to read both later. First, let me share how a young Amish girl drove it home recently.
We met some friends from an Amish Family during an annual visit to Pennsylvania. Two of the younger girls were our first encounter at their gift shop. We’d provided a “gift bag” that included an item that required some explanation because it was a bit of a joke. I noted that their older sister “Rachel” might use it in her job as an Amish Teacher. (Last year was her first year. We’d shared some thoughts on teaching and explored some of the differences between an Amish one-room schoolhouse and my experience as a substitute teacher in a public school. )
The youngest girl, “Katie,” advised us that Rachel would not be teaching this fall. I expressed some surprised concern–she’d seemed quite passionate about teaching. Nine-year-old Katie explained, “She’s in a relationship.”
Janice asked, “Do we like him?” Katie replied, quite matter-of-factly, “Rachel does.”
When Rachel joined us, I couldn’t resist singing, “Rachel’s got a boyfriend.” She rolled her eyes and laughed, giving Katie a “you told, didn’t you” look. She didn’t offer much about him, but in explaining her decision not to teach this fall, she shared in Amish matter-of-fact tones, “I believe it’s best not to have too many priorities in life.”
When talking with the Amish, I try to consider their point of view because it’s often quite different from most. I’ve used the description “matter of fact” intentionally in describing Katie and Rachel’s explanation. The Amish are often referred to as “plain people.” Katie and Rachel spoke plainly–some would say “simply,” but that’s not entirely accurate. The Amish point of view is one where marriage and family are a huge priority–throughout their entire lives. It can seem strange or even backward to us “Englischers,” who are often focused on individuality, education, and careers.
The point here is not to understand Rachel’s decision but to see the clarity of her priorities. (She was busy weed-wacking the fence line of the family farm when we arrived.)
I don’t know precisely how old Rachel is, but probably in her late teens. She has figured out something most of us don’t. Ultimately, how busy we are is a matter of our priorities. And, for the most part, our priorities are of our own choosing.
Rachel didn’t complain that she was weed-whacking in temperatures in the high nineties with oppressive humidity. She apologized for her sweaty appearance and made it clear she would get right back at it following our visit.
I think one reason I enjoy the Amish so much is their unassuming and selfless outlook. From what I’ve seen, they don’t complain much. Gellasenheit*. Most of the Amish I know don’t give advice. They live it. Rachel doesn’t know it, but she has helped me make several important decisions. Those decisions are based on the possibility I just might have too many priorities in my life.
She’s also aroused my curiosity. I’ll ask her if she has a bucket list the next time we visit. I won’t be surprised if she replies, “What is that?”
We Englischers seem to live with a deficit approach wherein life is about what we don’t have and how we’re going to get it. When we start to think we’re too busy, it may be time to remember Rachel. “It’s best not to have too many priorities in life.”
*Gellasenheit is a difficult concept to explain in a few words, but it’s about “yieldedness” and letting things be. It helps explain the Amish tendency to yield to tradition and “let things be.”
