Tag Archives: kids

Making Change and Not Making Changes

Chose both the road and how far down it you’ll travel

An important part of a recent vacation was spent in the Lancaster Pennsylvania area—also called “Amish Country.” When I lived closer, visits to the area were frequent and I developed a familiarity with the area. So this was an interesting opportunity to return after a decade of absence.There is much truth in the saying, “The more things change, the more they stay the same.” While there were some obvious changes to the area—it was equally obvious that many things have not changed. I have always avoided the heavily trafficked tourist areas and never shared the common perspective that Amish folks are a tourist attraction. I’ve always considered myself a guest among these special people.

One favorite back road farm stand had not changed much, although the attendant was now a nine year old Amish girl working alone indicating a new generation is now involved. She was pleasant and efficient, totaling up our purchases using a simple calculator. When I presented her with an unusual combination of bills and coin she pushed the calculator aside, took my offering, and counted back the correct change without hesitation. Watching her box our purchases cheerfully and carefully in the hundred degree heat was humbling.

I can’t help but contrast this with another experience several days prior. We ate at a restaurant where some of the servers were perhaps nearly twice my Amish friend’s age. Several of them actually couldn’t stop texting (or talking) on their smart cell phones while they were walking between the kitchen and their customers’ tables. They of course used computers to document our order and calculate our final bill. I did not test our waitress’s change making ability—credit cards eliminate that need anyway.

The Amish are also among one of the most misunderstood groups of people, often considered “backward” and “out of touch.” The point of this contrast is not to demonstrate that–the point is quite the contrary.

I would offer that the Amish are actually quite progressive. What makes them “different” is that they are selectively progressive. (Remember, my young friend did use a calculator for part of the transaction. Not long ago a brown paper bag and pencil would have been the tool of choice.) The important distinction between the Amish and society in general is that the Amish only embrace technology after careful and deliberate consideration of the impact it will have on individuals, families, and the community.

One of my frequent observations that might parallel this is “just because you can do something, that doesn’t mean you should do it.” We are inclined to want the latest and best. Technology offers lots of temptations. Why watch that old TV when you can have a wide screen? (The Amish question might be “why watch TV at all?”) Only a few months to go and I can upgrade my smart phone to one that’s even smarter! The possibilities are endless, really.

So while it would be possible and perhaps be nice to be able to order online from that farm stand in Pennsylvania (they make incredible pickles), I’m willing to concede that for this Amish family to embrace that technology would require some major changes in their lives. And for me it would mean that a visit a few years from now not only wouldn’t be necessary, but wouldn’t be possible.

Call me backward and out of touch, but I’m not ready to give those visits up.

Grab A Bucket…

The idea of having a bucket list (things you are committed to doing during your life) has become more than popular–it’s nearly viral. Traditionally follks haven’t thought seriously about their life accomplishments until their mortality becomes real. Now I hear young people and kids talking about their bucket list.

Well, here’s another bucket idea that I think is extremely adaptable, practical, and useful. The idea is geared for kids — they get all the good stuff — but once you get the fundamentals, you can see it working in organizations, families, companies… The bucket represents your mental and emotional self. You fill your bucket with words and actions that demonstrate you care about somebody.

One adaption of this was made successfully by the Livermore Maine School Committee with an elementary school program to encourage positive behavior and make it a habit. A feature of the program is a literal bucket–when teachers and staff see a student “being nice” to someone they write the child’s name on a slip of paper and place it in the bucket. A monthly drawing means students receive recognition in the form of extra recess time, books, etc.

Back in my corporate consulting days, we used a similar approach with “something extra” coupons. Every employee was allowed to award a coupon to another employee for positive behavior that “went beyond” the norm. While coupons could be redeemed for lunch discounts, etc. we found that most people didn’t redeem them and kept theirs as trophies!

There are some great kids books about bucket filling–for information and resources visit the Bucket Filler Website. Put on your creative hat and see how your family could have a bucket… or just make it a personal habit of making sure you do something every day to fill your own bucket!

This idea was also posted on New England City and Town News Notes–a great site for news and ideas from around New England!

Slightly More Than 24 notes…

I guess I’ve heard “taps” played many times throughout my life… most of those occasions were at Memorial Day or Veterans’ Day Celebrations. While not all of the the times have been “perfect,” the sentiment always is and it seems to be one of the occasions when silence reins in the too thin crowds. For the duration we seem to become aware of the number of flags flying in the cemetery we visit on these special days.

Since many of us will be experiencing this Monday, here’s a little taps trivia. The original version of what we call “Taps” was written by Daniel Butterfield in 1801 and was then named “Last Post.” It was rather lengthy and formal so in 1862 it was shortened to 24 notes and re-named “Taps.”

The performance of the original version embedded here makes the rounds every so often… it has a lot to recommend it. For one thing it was performed in Holland by a reasonably popular trumpeter named Melissa Venema. At the time of this recording she was thirteen years old. It’s pretty powerful–turn off all distractions, listen and watch. You won’t hear a false note and you will be as mesmerized as the crowd who watches her perform with the Johann Strauss Orchestra under the capable direction of Andre Rieu.

And maybe you could think about attending a Memorial Day Event to hear it played again–perhaps not as well, but with just as much meaning.

From my side of the desk…

I’m always hesitant to call myself a teacher… for a lot of reasons, I suppose. One is that I do spend a lot of time at the local elementary school as a volunteer and I do not want any role confusion. (I had a young fellow at school ask me if he could something the other day. I replied that he needed to ask his teacher. His reply secretly made my day. “But you teach me stuff–like how to read!” Okay, but you still need to ask your official teacher.)

I do teach. I guess  I can consider myself officially a teacher of adults. And the role of the teacher and student is an interesting one… I’m often surprised–or at least disappointed– that a number of my adult students expect it to be somewhat adversarial. One of my colleagues reported a student announcing that since she was “the customer” and paying for the course she “would do whatever she wanted in class.” Fortunately, my colleague had the presence of mind to reply, “Yes, you are the customer and you can do whatever you like. I am the instructor and can do whatever I like–including giving you a failing grade for the course.”

I’m convinced that we’ve got this wrong in a very fundamental way. I think it stems from a too-often adversarial relationship between parents and teachers. It is not my intent to contribute to the hostility by defending teachers–certainly we are not a perfect profession at any age or grade level. I also do not want to over-simplify the topic.

But I do want to suggest that we get rid of the desk. I don’t want to sit behind it and I don’t want my students or their parents sitting in front of it. (Okay, I’ve never had an adult learner’s parent intercede on the students’ behalf, but I have been contacted by spouses.)

Let’s sit next to each other and talk about what it is that we are trying to achieve. Your homework assignment is to read this article before we meet:

“What teachers want to tell parents.”

The assignment applies even if you aren’t a parent of school-aged children, because our class discussion will be about how we view education and development… and how easy it is to forget what we’re trying to accomplish with it.